Post 2

Ok, so can I just say how proud I am that I am posting about my word for 2011 TWO days in a row! Partly it's because I didn't have Jazzercise tonight due to Shelby County Schools still being closed (and that's the schedule we follow). Learned eight new routines tonight...so watch out!

...and back to my word.

CALM

Bible Verse for the day (for me!):

"If a ruler's anger rises against you, do not leave your post; CALMness can lay great offenses to rest." Ecclesiastes 10:4

Now of course this one particular verse is taken out of context in the entire chapter, however; this word is about how I'm going to interpret it for me. So when I read this verse the first thing that I tried to understand is the "...ruler's anger." Now for me, I would say that this could be pressure placed on me in my life. Could this pressure be placed on me based on my own doing? Yes. What's the pressure I've place on my life? Anxiety. Like seriously, life altering, mind tormenting, and annoying anxiety. The crazy thing is, I do it to myself. I worry myself to the point of being sick at times.

...of course people say..."Worrying solves nothing." That is completely true, but to a compulsive worrier, we just worry about why we are worrying so much. Vicious circle.

When I was working at Graves Elementary, a teacher once said to me (speaking specifically about worry) "Worry pays interest on nothing." How true is that? If you worry, you are placing unwanted stress on your body over things that your CAN'T change.

So, let me move on to the next part of this verse which says, "do not leave your post..." Now my interpretation of this is that when you are presented with problems, such as this "ruler's anger," stand your ground and demand that you remain calm. I need to remember this. I won't leave my post, I will stand strong, know God is walking this journey with me, and trust that He won't leave my side. When I type this out, I literally just said to myself, "Why do I ever worry when I know God is by my side?" I mean seriously, what better comfort is that? Will someone please remind me of my words when I am weak?

Finally, on to the last part of this verse which is, "...calmness can lay great offenses to rest." Here is what I "hear" in this part. Remaining calm will cause these worries to go away. That is why I chose this word to begin with. I toyed with the idea of using the words, worry, anxiety, and self-control...but I can have none of those until I find the calm in my life.

Let's face it, our world is fast paced and chaotic. We are trying to juggle so many things at once, and this is somehow supposed to make us feel accomplished.

So here is how I will try to find my calm this year. Just based on this verse alone. I need to print my blog out and tape it to every wall in my house, classroom, and car windshield.
1. Stop placing STUPID pressure on my life (i.e. anxiety, which includes worrying about things and then also worrying about why I have nothing to worry about.)
2. Stand my ground, and fight for my sanity. Cling to God and tell him everything and worry about nothing.
3. When 1 and 2 are complete I will find that calm and can literally put all my worries to bed.

If I've said it once, I'll say it again, this can't happen over night...but just in two days looking at the Scripture, I'm finding calm in moments in my life.

For example, today at work...we had a snow day Monday and of course while I loved the time off, there is that sense of panic when you go into the classroom and realize "Oh my! I had all this planned and in order to take the next step we have to squeeze two days into one!" I took a deep breath, made a new plan, and me and my third graders got it all done.

Just taking that brief moment to close my eyes, ask God to help me, and take a deep breath. There it is...Calm.

Oh I'm waiting for the day when I can live my whole day in the moment.

Much love y'all...find your calm.

Mrs. B