Post 5

Yikes, I've fallen behind on my posting about my new calm 2011!

I read this today online, and it's a phrase that I have heard many times before. It goes hand and hand with calmness.

"Let go, and let God."

That phrase is so simple, so true, and so hard to do! I mean, it sounds easy...but in our crazy chaotic world WE want to be in control. So, as I sat here reflecting on that, I realized that the moments in which I am NOT calm are those moments when I am trying to control everything. I'm not letting God have the reins.

As humans on this Earth, we do not have on single say over anything that is happening, is going to happen, and what has happened. (How do you like the use of verb tenses there? I'm working on that with my 3rd graders right now. ha)

I know there are people out there like me. You let a thought consume you so deeply that you have trouble functioning! I mean, you smile and nod and put on this front that you have everything calm, cool, and collected inside. The reality is that inside you have a storm brewing. That storm is building and building until finally the clouds give way to a downpour.

You can talk to people, and they'll comfort you for the time being. However, when you are alone with your thoughts that's when anxiety hits at it's worst.

Don't get me wrong, I have come a LONG way in my battle with anxiety. It's been a long fight but it gets better and better. Staying busy helps, but it isn't the answer. As soon as you stop running around, the worry, the anxiety, and the helpless feeling is there waiting for you. However, grounding yourself in your faith, and talking about it with someone helps to bring you that calm and peace.

I can remember having this moment one time. It was a time in my life when I was hearing of TERRIBLE things going on. A friend with cancer, people diagnosed with life threatening illnesses, and other various things. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, "well if all of these bad thing can happen to them, it will happen to me soon too." Wow. Do I sound crazy or what? I think more of you have that feeling too... Anyway, I know that I have heard of people hearing God's voice speak to them, and I'm not sure if that is what happened to me...but, I can remember being in the shower and thinking about all of these troubles people were going through. I distinctively had a thought come into my head that said, "That's their journey, not yours." I don't know if this was God or not, but I'd like to think it was. I remind myself of that phrase when moments feel overwhelming. "That's their journey, not yours."

I remember the first time Chris saw me have a freak out moment. I think it scared him. Honestly, I can't remember what set me off the first time, but he remembers that he had a helpless feeling of trying to comfort me, and not being able to say the right things. He stayed with me regardless, and I think it brought us closer because I shared something very personal with him. I completely trust him with my anxiety!

So in today I didn't choose a piece of scripture to write about. I heard that phrase and wanted to elaborate on it and also challenge myself to, "Let go, and let God."

Have a blessed weekend y'all,

Mrs. KB

Post 4

...so now I have a new calm in my life. Now, while it is a big responsibility, I still look at this new addition to our lives as a little blessing.

Meet Bella

Notice her new Momma's happy face. I have ALWAYS wanted a Yorkie. Chris found a private breeder here in Memphis and he had one little lady left. She was waiting for us.

She is just about the cutest thing you'll ever see. Here are her stats: 7 weeks old, about 1 lb, stands about 3 inches tall, and she is SPOILED ROTTEN! Tomorrow she will go to the vet for a check up, she's had her first round of shots. So here is my baby!

"God made the animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God said that it was good." Genesis 1:25

The rest of this post I want to devote to a completely unrelated topic, but something that I need my friends praying about.

On Friday, one of the little boys in my class was on a field trip with us. His mom also joined us. She received a call while on the trip that their house was on fire. She quickly took her boy and left. I was stunned, didn't really know what to do. I stopped right their and prayed for this sweet family.

We returned to school, and my supervisor and I drove over to their home, only to find the shell of a house standing, the insides burnt completely. It's this next part that will never leave my mind. This child, standing their, in his fathers jacket (he left his with us on the field trip), looking at his house in shambles. He sees me walking down his street (the fire dept shut it down), runs towards me and hugs me. He says, "Mrs. Burleson, we've literally lost everything. My hamsters died." Oh, tears immediately came to my eyes.

We stayed awhile, and left to go back to school. I had to go back to school and field the questions from the other students about their sweet friend. They made touching cards, and later that evening along with some other co-workers we went back to his grandmothers house (across the street) with dinner and a few odds and ends.

There were people coming and going from everywhere. Church members pulling charred belongings out of the house. His father covered head to toe in black. His mother still had an amazing smile. Needless to say, I was touched...and I'm sure this family is as well.

Today I spoke with his mom and she is so strong. She feels so blessed. And they are.

If you're reading this, I want you to stop right now and pray.

Pray for this sweet family, pray for my student, pray for the grandparents who are taking them in, pray for their family dog who is suffering from the impact of smoke inhalation , and praise God for all of the people who are helping this family.

We will be holding a special chapel service at work on Tuesday, and we also are going to do whatever helps this family.

Here is what I am going to do for my student: buy him two new hamsters. He got those hamsters for Christmas, and told me all about him at school. So if you know anything about hamsters, speak up, I want to pick the best of the best.

God is awesome. He's showing this family just how awesome he is.

Mrs. KB

Post 3

LOOK OUT! I am on a role people. Day 3 towards my calmer lifestyle!

So here is what I will add to my blogs about my word. I am going to add the moment of calmness I found in this day. Here it is:

I got a Nook for Christmas, and it is like the best invention ever! I mean, could I get any lazier by saying I no long can turn the pages of a book? Well...can I just say e-readers make it so incredibly easier to read while exercising! I got on the elliptical for 50 minutes today and read while working out. It made the time pass by so quickly and oh my, was it calm! By far the calmest part of my day. Normally my workouts are when I teach Jazzercise and when you are teaching you can't really relax while you work out. Now, I don't know of many people who really relax when they work out, but y'all know what I mean right? So here I am on my elliptical, in a total calm bliss! What was I reading? Well, I have three books on my nook right now: Living a Life of Balance, The Freedom Writers Diaries, and Breaking Dawn (aka the last book in the Twlight series). I've decided to re-read Breaking Dawn...yes I said RE-read because I have read all of the books in the series. However, this weekend ALL that came on the movie channels was Twilight and New Moon....and then of course that made me want to watch Eclipse. So I decided in preparation for what is sure to be a CRAZY movie for the fourth book (which is being filmed as two separate films) I am going to re-read it so I can remember. Plus, it's mindless reading that is just pure entertainment. All that blabbing aside...I read the book while working out and it made me CALM! Whoo!

It's amazing how hard you will work towards your word when you constantly keep it on your mind.

The Bible verse I have chosen for today is:

"They were glad when it grew calm, and he guided them to their desired haven." Psalm 107:30

I think this verse is fitting for today, specifically in my instance of calm today.

"They were glad when it grew calm...." Am I glad when things are calm? Yes. However, isn't there a little part of us that thrives on the crazy drama in our lives that keeps us in a tizzy? Then, isn't it exhausting once we realize how much energy that we put forth towards this drama that we really had no business dealing with? Maybe you aren't like that...but I'd be lying to myself if I said I wasn't like that at times.

I will take this away from this verse: I need to rejoice in the calm moments in my life, rather than the drama filled moments of my life, or in some cases other peoples lives. I think the more I practice that, the more I will realize that drama is, "so five minutes ago." (That was a reference from Clueless...sigh)

"...and he guided them to their desired haven." Of course, this verse is taken out of context and the "he" that is spoken of is not Jesus. However, I like to look at it that way because I think he does guide us to this haven. For me, the haven is a worry free, anxiety free place. So, this makes complete sense! If I calm my life down, God will lead me to my haven of no worry and no anxiety. Oh hallelujah that sounds amazing.

This verse speaks volumes, and I know we all can have different interpretations. I would love to know your thoughts. I know some of you on your blogs are doing this very same thing. Embracing one word to guide you through 2011. I don't know about you but one word seems way less overwhelming that a list full of resolutions. This trend is kinda cool.

As I sit here typing I am put to the ultimate test of my calmness. My Memphis Tigers are playing, it isn't on TV, and I'm watching the scores role in on my iPhone using my nifty ESPN sports zone app (its free btw all iPhone users!) Can I remain calm and watch the scores and not the game. Well, if the point spread stays like this, I sure can. Go Tigers!

Thank you to all the people who have left me sweet comments either on my blog or on facebook. Your inspiration is a big help.

Until post 4! (Watch out it just might be tomorrow!)

Mrs. KB

Post 2

Ok, so can I just say how proud I am that I am posting about my word for 2011 TWO days in a row! Partly it's because I didn't have Jazzercise tonight due to Shelby County Schools still being closed (and that's the schedule we follow). Learned eight new routines tonight...so watch out!

...and back to my word.

CALM

Bible Verse for the day (for me!):

"If a ruler's anger rises against you, do not leave your post; CALMness can lay great offenses to rest." Ecclesiastes 10:4

Now of course this one particular verse is taken out of context in the entire chapter, however; this word is about how I'm going to interpret it for me. So when I read this verse the first thing that I tried to understand is the "...ruler's anger." Now for me, I would say that this could be pressure placed on me in my life. Could this pressure be placed on me based on my own doing? Yes. What's the pressure I've place on my life? Anxiety. Like seriously, life altering, mind tormenting, and annoying anxiety. The crazy thing is, I do it to myself. I worry myself to the point of being sick at times.

...of course people say..."Worrying solves nothing." That is completely true, but to a compulsive worrier, we just worry about why we are worrying so much. Vicious circle.

When I was working at Graves Elementary, a teacher once said to me (speaking specifically about worry) "Worry pays interest on nothing." How true is that? If you worry, you are placing unwanted stress on your body over things that your CAN'T change.

So, let me move on to the next part of this verse which says, "do not leave your post..." Now my interpretation of this is that when you are presented with problems, such as this "ruler's anger," stand your ground and demand that you remain calm. I need to remember this. I won't leave my post, I will stand strong, know God is walking this journey with me, and trust that He won't leave my side. When I type this out, I literally just said to myself, "Why do I ever worry when I know God is by my side?" I mean seriously, what better comfort is that? Will someone please remind me of my words when I am weak?

Finally, on to the last part of this verse which is, "...calmness can lay great offenses to rest." Here is what I "hear" in this part. Remaining calm will cause these worries to go away. That is why I chose this word to begin with. I toyed with the idea of using the words, worry, anxiety, and self-control...but I can have none of those until I find the calm in my life.

Let's face it, our world is fast paced and chaotic. We are trying to juggle so many things at once, and this is somehow supposed to make us feel accomplished.

So here is how I will try to find my calm this year. Just based on this verse alone. I need to print my blog out and tape it to every wall in my house, classroom, and car windshield.
1. Stop placing STUPID pressure on my life (i.e. anxiety, which includes worrying about things and then also worrying about why I have nothing to worry about.)
2. Stand my ground, and fight for my sanity. Cling to God and tell him everything and worry about nothing.
3. When 1 and 2 are complete I will find that calm and can literally put all my worries to bed.

If I've said it once, I'll say it again, this can't happen over night...but just in two days looking at the Scripture, I'm finding calm in moments in my life.

For example, today at work...we had a snow day Monday and of course while I loved the time off, there is that sense of panic when you go into the classroom and realize "Oh my! I had all this planned and in order to take the next step we have to squeeze two days into one!" I took a deep breath, made a new plan, and me and my third graders got it all done.

Just taking that brief moment to close my eyes, ask God to help me, and take a deep breath. There it is...Calm.

Oh I'm waiting for the day when I can live my whole day in the moment.

Much love y'all...find your calm.

Mrs. B

Post 1

This is post number 1 in my challenge to choose one word to change my life in 2011.

My word: CALM

My daily Bible verse using my word:

"A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel." Proverbs 15:18

I have to admit, I can be a hot-tempered person. Really I can. It's usually involving something I'm very passionate about or if I have a very strong opinion about it. It gets me into trouble. However, something else I have to realize about myself is that I sometimes actually seek out these conflicts because I'm nosy, or just curious. I need to STOP. Immediately.

Now, I'll stop beating up on myself for a minute and say that I also calm quarrels. I am a teacher. While I don't teach in an environment that is quite as hostile as it used to be, I still resolve quarrels. This is with children. And on occasion I might have to calm a quarrel between friends, but I need to do better. I want to be that calm presence that defuses a situation rather than gets involved in it.

The weird thing is that I can remember when I was in premarital counseling Chris and I took the Taylor Johnson personality assessment and I rated very high on the HOSTILE side. Now, this isn't hostile like I'm about to jack someone up, it means being more passionate about something, to the point of becoming anxious (according to Eli). So, it makes sense that I picked this word.

Now, I'm going to do the very best I can to blog as often as possible and dive deeper into this word and how it is used in the Scripture. I can't promise everyday, but I'm going to try. There are SO many verses that use this word.

You can check out my source here: Biblegateway.com

So, as I sit here hoping for another snow day (which most likely won't happen) I wish anyone reading this the calmness that I am searching for. I also challenge you to do this with me. I want to read your journey too!

Mrs. B

I'm up for the challenge!

...so yesterday Craig started a new sermon series at hope about the new year and challenged us all to instead of making new years resolutions, focus on one word for the new year. Now, I've read several blogs, and facebook posts and many of you are already doing it. I've decided to try it, and see where it leads me this year. So are you ready to hear my word for the year??

CALM

Yep, that's it. Those of you who know me well enough know that I am a high strung, anxious, worry stricken, and NOT calm person. I know part of that is just me...and my personality...but part of my anxiety can be crippling at times, and that isn't healthy. It takes a lot of the joy out of my life at times, and sometimes it keeps me from living in the moment.

So, I'm going to try...with all of my might to work on this word. CALM. In fact, if you're reading this and you happen to be around me when I am not calm, then I want you to remind me of this. Please! Because I know that I can't do this alone. It'll take God, and my friends and family to help me...and hopefully in 2012 I can pick a new word to focus on. Always moving forward!


That being said, today has been pretty calm with a nice snow day. It's so quiet and peaceful outside. Here's a look at our house in the snow this morning. I have to say it's pretty cool waking up to your very own first house and taking a snow picture. :)

This is the only time that I've liked this tree! It looks pretty today!


And our snowman dressed at Michael Jackson...check out the glove!


Check out us posing with our piece of work!

Hope y'all had a great day.

Much love,

Calm Katie

So it's been awhile...

Christmas was great, it went fast...but it was great. However, the big news is in the super, wonderful, fantastic honeymoon we just got back from yesterday. I don't have time now, but, coming soon look for a post all about it.

Happy New Year to you all!

Mrs. B